First Camper Tour

Over the weekend I took a little trip to Albertville, Alabama to look at a camper I’d seen online.  Not every day is a good day.  And while this wasn’t necessarily a bad day , it wasn’t the best.

First off I was kind of sad because I was going alone.  Most days I’m all #girlpower and fine with being introverted and private and single and kind of the odd one out.  There are days though, when it gets to me and I just get sad.  So off the bat the trip started in a funk of sorts.  I was determined to put a smile on and turn that frown upside down though so off I went!

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With about half an hour left in my trip I finally got on top of it.  I was jamming with Amazon Music.  Had a pretty good concert going.  Since I was actively choosing them, the tunes were on point.  Avett Brothers, Tamela Mann, Luther Vandross, Sara Bareilles, Destiny’s Child…  Voice sounded better than it has in a while.  Dance moves, as always, were perfection.  My spirits started lifting.

As I get closer to Albertville I start thinking a second trip will definitely be in order.  A nearby town is having some sort of festival in a few weeks.  I love those things!  Further down I noticed a few interesting stores.  One said it sold catalog returns.  I didn’t know this was a thing!  Another was called something like ‘Ollie’s Good Stuff for Cheap’.  How could I not?  Some little hole in the wall restaurant I can’t remember the name of – Somebody’s Fast Country Cooking or something.  Hole in the wall restaurants are always excellent.  It’s a life rule.  So at this point I’m pretty excited.

I made it to the RV lot – a chain called Bankston.  Walked in the building where one guy was sitting behind a desk.  He told me I could just walk around on my own.

I start roaming the lot and really, I don’t have a clue where I am or how to get where I want to be.  Their campers are packed in like puzzle pieces with barely five inches between them.  I spend about 15 minutes walking through random new campers I can’t afford until a guy finally drives down in a golf cart to find me.  “There you are!” he says with a smile.

He asks what I’m looking for and as soon as I ask where the used campers are his face drops like I just ruined his entire week.  He points and tells me the camper boundaries.

“From the Keystone to the Jayco and then back this way,” is basically what I get.

I ask about a specific camper I saw online and just when I thought his face couldn’t get more disappointed it turns out he’d saved a little just for me.

He does take time to walk me over to that specific camper and then explains to me it’s a rebuilt title and there’s a crack in the floor they haven’t repaired yet, but will.  None of this was posted online.

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Two and a half hour drive.  One way.

I had asked if there were other campers in the same price range.  He told me no so I looked through the rebuilt unit despite the title issue because what else do you do when you’ve driven that far for nothing?  About two minutes into my tour the guy – who’s been standing at the door – is over it and asks if he should just let me browse on my own.  Sure, buddy.  Go doodle in your notebook.

Granted, my budget is low.  No one is going to make a fortune off commission from me, but I’m still a customer!

After touring that unit I found another couple that were within about $4k of the one I’d come to see.  But earlier, according to the salesman there were none in my price range.

At this point I was somewhat disgusted so I made my way back to my car.

On the positive side, I got to see a few campers up close and personal.  I found a shower design I now know I absolutely do not want in any camper I buy.

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Not the exact shower I almost died in….

I am not kidding.  I stepped in and slid the doors closed and I almost had a panic attack.  I opened the doors right back up, stepped out and vowed never to ever again step foot in one.  Definitely gonna need a tub with a shower curtain where I can breathe.

It was also interesting for me seeing the cabinets, the oven, the sink, the microwave.  These things are tiny!!!  I knew they would be smaller.  I didn’t realize how much smaller.  It’s like an Easy Bake!

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Disappointed with my visit, I pull out of the camper lot and head back home.  So, Albertville is a small city (as far as I can tell) that seems to be set up with one main road that everyone uses to get from Point A to Point B.  This one main road also happens to be a state highway so in addition to the locals you have all the rest of America that needs to get anywhere near Albertville.

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Please ignore the dirty window.  I need new wiper blades….

Not exactly in the picture above, but where this camper lot is located there are several miles of businesses and stop lights and turn lanes which also means there’s more traffic.  This means it’s bumper to bumper, slower speeds, stops, and starts.

I’m about three or four miles down from the lot when I happen to glance into my rearview mirror and see the driver and his wife behind me have decided to join me in my backseat.  I don’t know how long this has been going on, but I do know that today ain’t the day and I ain’t the one.

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I am not a slow driver.  That being said, there is an invisible line behind any vehicle I drive.  If this line is crossed, I immediately put on a live demonstration testing the laws of physics to determine exactly how slowly my vehicle can go while still technically moving.

There were cars in front of me, beside me, and catty corner to me.  I had no where to go.  The guy hit his horn so I tested my brakes.  He finally goes around me and for the first time in at least 15 years I got flipped off.

Y’all!  Does anyone else do this?  I mean, I flip people off all the time joking around.  But for real?  I think an adult seriously flipping someone off is one of the most hilarious things on the planet!!

No matter who is doing the flipping, this is what I see.  Even if it’s me!

kid flipping off

I ended up driving to Birmingham where I roamed around the city until that night when I finally had a hockey game to go watch!!  More on that later.

For now, happy trails!  May you have no one joined to your vehicular backside and no adult fingers flipped in your direction!

 


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